CAB 6 : You don't get a 2nd chance to make a first impression

Hello networker

From last week, you already have your ‘Elevator Pitch’ and ‘FROG” ready. So now is about how to manage the conversation when you are networking to create the best first impression.

How long do you think it takes for someone to make a judgement about a person that they have just met?

Research shows that most people make a first impression of a person within 7 seconds. We based our judgement based on what we see - the appearance and the behaviour.

When it comes to appearance we are in full control of the image that we want to project. We can dress up to look professional, we can intentionally dress up to look more casual or we can also not pay attention and just grab whatever that we have in the wardrobe that day.

When I did my photoshoot a few weeks back, I told the photographer Kinji Low that I wanted to look smart, professional and approachable. I also said that I wanted to look like Barack Obama because he has some amazing photos.

From the photo I am sure you agree that Kinji did a great job to fulfil my request. What I wanted to show to you is that we are fully in control of the image that we want to project.

So think about what kind of personal image that you want to have. My suggestion is that you choose 3 words to describe yourself. Remember this is how you want other people to describe you when you are not around.

As most of us are working professionals, then the image that we want to project should include ‘professional’. As well as the professional appearance, our behaviour should also be professional. You should know what is the right etiquette for dining for different situations and in particular if you are dealing with people from different cultures. When addressing someone, you should know whether you are allowed to use their name or you must use their titles (eg. Datuk, Datin, Dr etc) which can be a sensitive topic for some people.

During a conversation, one of the most common mistakes that I observe is that people are not listening to the other person. They are either talking too much or when they are not talking they are busy waiting to ask the next question that they are not listening at all to the one who is speaking.

A good conversation should have a 40:60 ratio of talking to listening. So 60% of the time you should be listening to the other person. To be exact, the ratio is 43:57 and you can read about the research that produced these results here.

From a workshop that I attended many years ago, the trainer said that when listening you should be ‘Listening with Curiosity’. You want to know more and more about what the person is talking about. So once you get the conversation started, you will never run out of things to talk about because your curious mind will want to know more and more about the other person.

I have been told that I am a good listener. I must have gotten this skill from my time working as a doctor in the hospitals. I was constantly talking to patients taking their medical history to find out what is wrong with them and of course I had to listen to every word to make sure that I am not missing anything in their medical history.

So this week, I wrote about how to make a good first impression by paying attention to your appearance and how you conduct the conversation.

In the next edition, I will discuss about the importance of body language.

Remember the 43:57 ratio for a good conversation

For your personal image, write down 3 words to describe yourself. (This is how you want you want other people to describe you when you are not around)

The next ‘Az Me Anything’ webinar will be next Tuesday 1st August at 830pm. My guest for this episode is my CrossFit Coach Madhu and we will be discussing how to take care of our body. To register for the webinar please use this link https://tinyurl.com/4tra5d86